Gracie, Uncategorized

Counting

I knew I would eventually stop counting the days since her birth. I knew eventually the 17th day of the month would pass and would not beckon me to stop everything I am doing to silently mourn the loss my precious girl. I relieved, because every time those numbers stopped me in my tracks it… Read More Counting

Gracie

Blessed

Tomorrow is the 17th. I don’t know how long I will count. I don’t know how long I will anticipate that day coming an grieve all over again. I look forward to the day that it comes and goes and I have not taken time out to observe the lose. As it it is now… Read More Blessed

Gracie

Untangled

I have been adjusting and trying to figure out who I am, and who God wants me to be. I struggled a bit after Giselle-Grace died. I struggled trying to be what others needed me to be, I struggled with disappointing others. Even more I struggled with what my grieving should look like, and how… Read More Untangled

Gracie

Healing

I had a thought the other day. I hold on to the pain because if I let the pain go I would be letting Gracie go. The pain is the only thing left that tells me Gracie was real. That she was here. That sharp bitter, searing, unforgiving pain, keeps her memory alive. I’m afraid… Read More Healing

Gracie

Picking Up the Pieces

It has been tough trying to pick up the pieces and figure out how to just breathe again. It is by far the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I though giving birth to Giselle-Grace would be the hardest, then I thought saying goodbye would be the hardest, then the funeral. No the… Read More Picking Up the Pieces

Gracie

Hoping beyond Hope

My water broke @ 11:20pm on Friday March 16. We immediately came to the hospital as we were instructed to do. I’ve been here Since then. It’s now Sunday afternoon. The plan is to wait until the GiGi has no heart beat before they induce labor. We are at 38 hours after my water broke,… Read More Hoping beyond Hope